What's REALLY in MY Heart?

I know someone who frequently quotes an old Scottish Proverb that goes something like this:  When the heart is full, the tongue will speak.  I reckon my heart is fairly full; the question is, of what? I'm not sure I want to know the answer, although it's fairly obvious.

I can't begin to count the times my mouth has gotten me into trouble.  Rarely is saying too little my issue, and were that my issue, I'd have readily obtained a title of "virtuous woman."  After all, another familiar quote says that silence is a virtue.  Nope, never fit that category, either.

As I sat reflecting this past week on an upcoming New Year, I always ask a question about what needs to be changed in my life, or putting it in a positive way, "What is something that I can give to Jesus as a gift in this New Year?" When I prayerfully brought that question to him, my mind starting wandering back to all the verbal faux pas that a still haunt me. Truthfully, I can go all the way back to high school and come up with some great failures. However, I don't need to go back that far…I'm still working on the ones more recent that still pop up in my mind causing me no small amount of embarrassment, and, yes, shame. No matter how many times I ask forgiveness, of the individual I've hurt, or of the Lord, those words come back to bother me time and again.

Once a word flies, the damage has been done.  Indeed, it is a sword that is quick to pierce a soul, and the damage is slow to heal.  I wish I could say those words were just a "slip of the tongue" (whoever came up with that lovely excuse, I wonder?).  I wish I could say, "I just don't know where that came from!" I wish I could find an easy explanation, justification, or even a provocation, or excuse.  Typically, I can't.  This truth is probably the hardest pill for me to swallow, because once it flies, instead of edifies, I am no longer a safe place.  I am no longer trustworthy.  Those things are harder to regain than they are to lose.  So, EVERY TIME, I misuse the gift of words, I am nauseous, sad, and, yes, angry at myself (sometimes for years).  I'd like to learn the secret to holding my tongue prisoner.  I wish I could plant a little soldier as a guard with a bayonet on my tongue to poke me every time I am about to say something I shouldn't.  I fear, though, I'd have so many holes, saliva would constantly be dribbling down my chin.

Well, my friend's Scottish Proverb is entirely biblical.  This morning, I read Matthew 12:33-37. No mistake, I read it this morning, while all this is fresh on my mind.

"Either make the tree good, and its fruit good; or make the tree bad and its fruit bad; for the tree is known by its fruit.  How can you, being evil, speak what is good? For the mouth speaks out of that which fills the heart.  The good man out of his good treasure brings forth what is good and the evil man out of his evil treasure brings forth what is evil.  And I say to you, that every careless word that men shall speak, they shall render account for it in the day of judgment.  For by your words you shall be justified, and by your words you shall be condemned."

Ouch! Words reveal our character.  Our hearts all contain a treasure chest either filled personal treasure, or a Pandora's box filled with poisonous asps.  Out of the box spills what is in our hearts.  When the mouth speaks, I better listen!  I will never see what's in my heart more clearly than at that moment.  What's said is reflective of the inner condition.  There's work to be done. It begins on my knees!

Picture from one of my little treasures to represent our talk about this verse (refreshing fruit, or bitter lemons?).  The fruit that's produced is what justifies or condemns.