A Leprous Heart...Spiritual Preparation, Lent...and my Pursuit of the Almighty

As I entered the Lenten season last week, I mentioned a four-part prayer I'm praying each morning from Psalm 139.

Let me assure you, it works!

The Lord's a gentle-God, but still a convicting-One...

...and, in His graciousness, He's showing up and doing just that!

I'm good with it.

The more I trust Him with the authentic-me, the more I meet Him intimately.

I also mentioned that there was one other Lenten-prayer I'm praying...and saved it for this week.

First, some background.

One of the spiritual disciplines I've added is to read-the-bible-through over the course of 2020.

I've done this before, but have found when I do, I read to get through the assignment, and don't really spend time contemplating as I should.

Since I recognize this about me, I'm being more intentional to apply the "pondering."

Two and a half weeks ago, I read the story in Numbers 12 about Aaron and Miriam complaining to one another about Moses.

(It smelled strongly of jealousy to me...) "Has the Lord only spoken through Moses? Has He not spoken through us, too?"

Their complaints reached God's ears, and the Lord called the three of them to the Tent of Meeting, rather like being called to the principal's office.

The Glory of God descended in a cloud, and the Lord gave the two a severe "reminder." Not sure why Moses was there...but, maybe he needed God's affirmation!

"I speak to Moses as one face-to-face...why were you not afraid to speak against him?"

When the cloud lifted, Miriam was white with leprosy...

Moses prayed on Miriam's behalf:  "Heal her, Lord! Please, heal her!"

Leprosy would have sent Miriam into exile, unable to draw near to the Tent of Meeting, and therefore to the Lord.

But God...

He stepped in, sent her outside the camp for a period of seven days, and then she returned...healthy and whole (and, I imagine, without complaint)...

This isn't about why Miriam was cursed with leprosy and Aaron not...(I have my suspicions, though).

This is about something entirely different.

When I first read the story, I wondered if the punishment fit the crime...

Yes, I questioned the Lord.

Sometimes I grumble...just like Miriam.

I compare myself to others.

I "long for Egypt"...the way things once were...from time to time.

I recognized, I deserve Miriam's fate.

She wanted MORE.

Sometimes, I want MORE (of the wrong thing).

It's the same sin that trapped our mother, Eve, by the way...

Miriam met her unmet needs with anger, and she took it out on Moses (which was really taking it out on God).

So, in essence, the Scripture says, God treated her as if her father had "spit in her face."

Her skin-disease matched her heart-disease...and, therefore the punishment was equal to the crime...

Both were leprous.

Consequently, Miriam was sent outside the camp -

A time out, of sorts.

The more I contemplated, I realized, this action by God was not to reject her.

Not to curse her.

It was not because God didn't love her.

BUT, because He did.

The Lord loved her enough that He wanted to awaken her soul to her sin, so that she might draw near to Him again.

Even though she had behaved badly, the Lord wanted her to be near!

He wants all His people to draw near....

...and, it starts with the cleansing of confession!

With that, the second Lenten prayer began to form in my heart.

I want to learn from Miriam in a pro-active kind of way.

'Awaken, my soul, Lord...may I truly step out of my stubborn self, my competitive desire for MORE...that I may draw near to You."

And, that's my prayer:

Awake my soul, Lord God Almighty, that I might draw near!

It wasn't a day later, and the Lord confirmed this prayer in yet another way.

Stay tuned...that's next week!