A blank page is God's way of showing us how hard it is to be God.
-Anonymous-
Some days I get to this place...
The white page in front of me...
The blinking cursor accusing me with every flash...
And my mind is as clear as the virtual sheet of paper that just sits there....waiting....
I don't want to be God.
But, I want to be used of Him.
Therein lies the significance of why the white and the blinking black often seem to triumph over me.
A writing mentor once said, if you feel stuck and can't put something down on a page, then write up (meaning, just write more than what you intend, and you can always go back and delete).
What's in front of you is that effort.
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Years ago, I sat in the hot tub with my nephew, Andrew, one cold January afternoon.
Bay and I splurged that Christmas with puppy money from a litter we'd just sold, and purchased this family-pleasure as our "gift."
Andrew may have been 7-ish.
Small for his age.
Adorable.
And, he had me wrapped around his little finger.
He stood by my desk as I was working on taxes in order to complete a college FAFSA (do universities still employ these terrible tactics?)...
He wanted to know if I was getting in the hot tub that day, or what???
It didn't take much pleading for me agree to join him for five-minutes, which, I might add, turned much longer.
We both changed (he kept a suit at my house), and in we went.
He wanted stories.
Stories of all the animals I had seen during the years we lived in Kenya.
With each animal I mentioned, he would draw in a deep breath, sigh, and on the exhale ask: "Oh, and what did they do?"
I painted verbal pictures of the amazing wildlife...even I was impressed...but Andrew was in AWE of each animal!
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That story came to mind this morning, as I began to think about the direction of this post; probably because of a quote I heard over the radio this week:
We must learn to fight fear with the right kind of fear....
It didn't take much contemplation to know the point...and I didn't stay in the car long enough to listen to the radio show host explain.
The meaning?
Fear withers under the wonder of God!
It does!
You can quote me on that...
This truth ties in with everything we have looked at thus far on our journey to #bebrave.
This statement seems to wrap it all up, put a bow on the package, and say it all (well, almost...we will still look at a few more thoughts to come).
Days after I sat in the hot tub with Andrew, I sat in my favorite corner...and, as I was writing in my journal, sensed the Lord whisper this statement to me:
"When we lose our wonder, we lose our worship..."
Now, I will add to that whisper, completing it this way:
"When we lose our worship, we will live in worrisome fear..."
How do I know?
Well, this verse stands out to me, keeping in mind "God is love":
The fear of the Lord leads to life, and whoever has it (the fear of the Lord) rests contentedly, unshaken by trouble.
Proverbs 19:23
As well, I think of the story where Jesus calms the sea when the frightened disciples wake him up in the back of the boat. All of a sudden, a "greater fear" rested on them driving away the very trouble that had them so shaken to begin with. Here is what Scripture says:
And the men were AWESTRUCK saying, "What sort of man is this, that even winds and sea obey him?
Matthew 8:27
Jesus had left them breathless with wonder and their fear had withered away.
Sometimes I'm caught off guard by Jesus.
Sometimes I'm thoroughly intrigued by Him.
But, it's not often I'm left breathless.
Yet, the God of Creation is Sovereign over and cares about every detail of my life.
That same God is showing up in my every single day...
And, my response should be child-like wonder.
I just simply forget to look for Him...with child-like-eyes!
So, the lesson Andrew taught me in the hot tub years ago? Well, I'll say it again, and try to remember it better:
When I lose my wonder, I lose my worship; and, when I lose my worship, I will live in worrisome fear!
BUT....
Fear withers under the wonder of God turned to worship!
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